Sometimes people go through life-changing moments that make them feel lost, hurt and unsureabout where to go next. Imagine a woman who has just ended an eight-year relationship after finding out her partner was unfaithful. She feels like her entire world has collapsed. There are tears, confusion and the overwhelming thought of starting over. While this kind of experience is sadly not uncommon, something about how it is shared nowadays is definitely different. Her journey is not just something she lives through, it also becomes something she gently shares
online, in short videos with soft music and thoughtful captions and long descriptions. A quiet moment of sadness, a hopeful walk through a city, a line of text about healing. All of it becomes part of a visible phase of recovery.
This raises thoughtful questions for us. Is sharing these personal moments a way to find strength and make sense of pain? Or does sharing these moments change the way we actually feel them? Does it help with healing or does it shift the focus outward?
Some might call this “Main Character Energy“, stepping into your story with courage and clarity. But when the story is shaped for others to see, it is not always easy to tell where genuine self expression ends and outside influence begins. From time to time, we do not even notice that we are changing parts of our story, just to make it look better or feel more accepted by others.
Think about Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and the City. Or Emily in Emily in Paris. We can take these characters as strong examples of being the “main character.” They somehow represent what it means to be the hero of your own story, which is not inherently bad. But when real people try to copy their lives based on fictional scripts it can lead to disorientation, comparison and internal conflict. In addition it is important to mention that Main Character Syndrome (MCS) is not a clinically diagnosed condition. MCS is more of a popular term used on social media by users the mselves. Furthermore, there is still a lack of academic sources to explore the topic in more depth.
People often make sense of their lives by turning experiences into personal stories. This helps them understand who they are, where they have been and where they are going. Social media adds a new layer to this process. Today it is not just about telling a story to yourself, but also to an audience. And when that audience responds with likes, comments or support the story becomes even more powerful even if it has been carefully edited. This might explain why some people feel more in control of their pain when they frame it as a dramatic transformation. It gives structure, meaning and emotional relief. At the same time, though there is a risk that personal healing turns
into performance and pain becomes content for public consumption.
Being the main character of your own life is not necessarily a bad thing. It can be a way to find meaning, strength and direction in difficult times. But it becomes a problem when we care more about being seen than actually healing. When the story we share is shaped more by what gets attention than by what feels true to us. Maybe the real challenge is not to stop telling our stories, but to make sure we are still living them for ourselves.
Contact Information:
Selina Demir
selinademir.aut@gmail.com
Instagram: selina.demr
